All That Matters Now
by kab16
Summary: Sawyer and Juliet, post finale. "Nothing that happened back there matters to me anymore. All that matters now is here. This, now, us. Nothing else."


_**Here I am, writing fanfiction at three in the morning the week before finals. Interestingly enough, this is exactly what I was doing at this time the week before finales last year. Only difference is that last year I was making my own season 6, and now I'm only writing an addition to the real one. And wow, I cannot believe I've been here for over a year. I don't think I've ever stayed passionate about something (well, except lost) for that long before. And now I'm rambling. That's what happens at three on the morning...the week before finales.**_

_**And now onto the story...**_

_All That Matters Now_

Everyone knew that Dr. Juliet Carlson hated to be the center of attention. And because they all loved her looked up to her, they tried to respect that. Rumors spread like wildfire in this place, and it was hard not to say anything, but they did it. If it was anyone else who began dating the top surgeon, anyone else having his kid, and anyone else divorcing him, they wouldn't be able to come within twenty feet of the hospital without hearing their name every where they went. But with Juliet, they were careful.

Tonight, though, they couldn't help it.

Juliet always stayed away from anything that could potentially throw her under the spotlight. But tonight she was walking right into it. Tonight, she couldn't help it.

Their hands were intertwined as they walked down the hallways. She knew that half of the female staff had been swooning over the good looking detective. When she came in to find Paik, a handful of nurses were behind the desk, discussing how they would go about getting his number. She found the whole thing rather silly. He couldn't be _that_ great. And the feeling was only confirmed when she saw him, his hand halfway up the vending machine.

Of course, then their hands touched and all of those thoughts were replaced by the memories. And once she had those memories, there was no way in hell she was ever letting go of him again.

Curious stares and whispers followed her everywhere. Some people just seemed confused; friends that knew (or _thought _they knew) Juliet well enough to know she'd never act like this. Others, most notably that group of nurses she never did get along with, seemed to be calculating ways to kill her.

Jealousy was a strange, strange thing.

Good lord the way people were looking at her! She was going to be buried alive tomorrow with all of the questions and gossip she'll have to deal with. If she's still here tomorrow, that is. She hasn't figured this whole thing out yet.

It didn't matter. None of it did. All that mattered right now was him.

"So, you're a cop now?" she smiled as they stepped into the elevator and the doors shut out all of those wondering stares and glares.

"Yep."

"And not a very good one, I see."

"What? Are you kidding me? I'm a _great _cop."

"You tried using your badge to justify rummaging through our vending machine."

"Yeah well," he took his hand out of hers and wrapped his arms around her. "You're pretty damn intimidating in that lab coat, and most chicks just mind their own business when they realize they're talkin' to a cop."

"Well I guess I'm not most chicks, huh?" she asked as she placed her own arms around his shoulders.

"Oh, God no." And then their lips were touching.

It took the sound of someone clearing their throat for them to realize that the doors had opened and a group of Juliet's interns were waiting outside. Juliet's face flushed as they pulled apart. "Hey guys."

"Dr. Burke," Kyle, the smart-ass who cleared his throat, greeted with a hint of accusation in his voice.

Juliet grabbed James' hand and as they moved through the group James whipped out his badge. "LAPD."

Kyle rolled his eyes. Juliet started to giggle and found that she couldn't stop.

"Seriously James?" she asked when they were safely out of the building.

"I'm telling you, Darlin', the badge works for everything."

"I think you just need to prove to yourself that you really are a cop here." She laughed again. "I'm sorry. I just cannot believe you're _actually_ a cop."

"Well what about you?" he joked back. "A fertility doctor? Really? At least _I_ took a risk, tried something new here. You're still doing the same old thing."

"Well, I wouldn't say I've been doing the _exact _same thing. I was married Jack." It is only after the words leave her mouth that she realizes that maybe that wasn't the greatest way to tell him.

He stopped in his tracks and stared at her. "You did _what_? You serious?"

She nodded slightly.

"You and the Doc...You knew each other here?"

Another nod.

"And you were_ married_?"

Nod.

"Wait a second...holy shit...that kid...he was yours, wasn't he?"

"What?"

"I passed you on the elevator, Juliet." Oh right. She had passed him earlier, hadn't she? While taking David to the concert. "And there was that kid with you...holy shit he was yours. ...Yours and Jack's_."_

It was a shock, that was for sure. But he couldn't be upset. It wouldn't be fair to her. After all, this was a different life. And up until a couple of minutes ago, they had no idea the other existed.

"So," he said, slipping his hand back in hers as he began to walk again in an attempt to let her know he was okay with it. "You knew the Doc in this life too. Weird, huh?"

"Yeah." She hesitated before adding nonchalantly, "And what about you?"

"What, do I know anyone from island life here?"

She nodded, but he knew what she was really asking. And after her _married-to-Jack –had-his-baby_ news, he was gonna have fun with it.

"Actually, I do. You'll have _no idea_ who I've been seeing for the last; oh what is it...six years now?"

She glared up at him while he just smiled at her innocently, dimples showing. "I think it's been six years."

"Yes?" she asked coldly.

"Miles," he grinned. "He's my partner. Business wise, I mean. You know," He showed his badge yet again. "Been seein' him every day."

She rolled her eyes. "Clever."

"You know you've missed me."

"More than anything." They looked at each other and she smiled and squeezed his hand. Maybe she didn't really remember him, but she did miss him. So, so much. She just needed to be reminded.

"So you knew the Doc for what, around fifteen years, right? Based on the kids-"

"David," Juliet said, tired of having her son referred to as 'The Kid.' "His name is David."

"Right. Well, he looks about fourteen-"

"Thirteen."

"Whatever. Point being, you've known the Doc for a while, while I only just met Kate after the plane landed. It's kinda weird how that worked out, ain't it?"

Juliet just shrugged. "Payback, I guess."

He stopped again and turned her toward him. "Juliet..."

"Hey," she smiled lightly, bringing a hand to his face. "It's okay. I was kidding."

"No you weren't. Listen. You know I love you right? You know that nothing, _nothing_ that happened back there with her matters to me don't you? I mean...you know I'm with you, that I..." He rambled on, barely understandable, looking elsewhere. She didn't know why he was trying so hard to gain her trust. As if he didn't already have it.

"Hey. James." She took his face in her hands and brought his gaze back to her. He looked terrified, almost. As if he was worrying that he was losing her all over again. "James, stop. I know. You think after all we've been through, to end up here together and I don't know? I'm sorry I said that. I love you. You have no idea. None of it matters to me now either. All that matters is now here. This, now, _you_. Nothing else."

He ran his hands through her hair, and before he knew tears were filling his eyes. "I watched you die," he choked out.

"I know." And then she threw herself into his arms. He held her as tight as he could.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "I'm so, so sorry."

"For what? For listening to me?"

"For looking at her. And for listening to you. That's never a safe thing to do."

She let out a small laugh. "I'm sorry too. I over reacted. But none of it matters now, right?"

He pulled away and rubbed his eyes before beginning to walk again. It didn't matter where.

"So you knew Jack, and I met Kate, but neither of us remembered until just now."

Juliet smiled. "I guess they weren't the ones we wanted to remember."

He stared at her. It was beginning to make her anxious. "What?"

"I love you."

I love you too."

There was a pause in the conversation where they both just walked, taking in the cool air and felt each others presence.

"So what is this place?"James asked. "I mean, we died, didn't we?"

"Well, I know I did."

"Me too. Thirty years after you. I don't know how I lived through it. I missed you so much."

"Did you meet Clementine?"

He smiled slightly. "Yeah. Good kid."

"I'm sure she was."

He went back to his original question. "So, are we dead then?"

"I don't know. I don't feel dead."

"Are you supposed to feel dead after you die?"

"Well, I don't believe I felt like the for thirty tears you were still alive."

"Do we even know if time exists here?"

"Jin said he'd 'see me there.' Where the hell is there?"

"Are we just gonna ask questions we don't have answers to forever?"

"We probably could," he smirked.

She grinned. "There's a church a little while away. I bring David there sometimes. Maybe we should go there."

He stared at her blankly, clearly confused. "You wanna go to church? Have some sins you need to repent for Blondie?"

She rolled her eyes but couldn't keep herself from laughing. "I think that's what Jin was talking about. I don't know, I just have this feeling."

"You think we're all supposed to meet up in some church?"

"I...guess." But the way he said it made it sound pretty stupid. "I don't know. I have Sun's number in her record though. We can go back and see-"

"Now hold up, Blondie. We can go to the church, but if time don't exist here, I don't see why we need to rush."

"We still don't know if it does or not."

"Either way. I haven't seen you in thirty years-"

"I thought you said time doesn't-"

"Oh, shut up, will you? I lived without you for thirty years. And if you think_ everyone's _gonna be at the church...well, something tells me it's going to involve some big complicated thing, most likely with your ex at the heart of it, and then...who knows? I don't know if I'm ready for that yet."

"So what are you saying James?"

He pulled her into him. "Well," he began suggestively. "We _could_ go get that coffee you mentioned a couple a decades's a go. _Or_..."

"My house is four blocks away."

"Well then," he stepped away from her and held out his hand. "Shall we?"

She smiled that smile that he loved; the one that haunted him every day after she was gone and that he couldn't now believe he managed living to without, and put her hand in his. "We shall. Detective."

_**The End! **_

**_Wow, I had fun with this. I just loved that Juliet was sort of making fun of him being a cop before they remembered. I have to have watched there reunion scene at least twice every day since the finale. Above and beyond unhealthy addiction? Probably. I just can't stop! _**

_**Anyhow, hope you enjoyed. I'm thinking of making a follow up that involves a bit of Miles and David (It seems to be believed that David just doesn't exist. But I love him, so I'm saying he does and that he is somehow going to be wherever Jack and Juliet and everyone end up. Because I love him.)**_

_**Also, to anyone reading DR? I don't know if I should finish it or just let it go now that the show is over. Any thoughts?**_

_**Well, Thanks for reading!**_

**_=)_**

_**-Sarah **_

****


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